Marriage – an eternal perspective

I was fortunate enough to begin my marriage in the right place, the temple of the Lord. In the temple, we made sacred covenants with our spouse and with God. Elder David A. Bednar likens this covenant to a triangle (“Marriage Is Essential to His Eternal Plan," Ensign, June 2006). Each spouse is a leg of the triangle and the Lord is the apex. As each spouse becomes closer to the Lord they will naturally be brought closer to each other.

Sometimes, my triangle leg is closer to the Lord and sometimes my husband’s is. We are both working to become closer to HIM.

What about those marriages which fall apart even if they begin in the temple? Elder Bruce C. Hafen in his address “Covenant Marriage” outlines three wolves of marriage: natural adversity, imperfections, and excessive individualism. (Ensign, November 1996)  I’d like to share how one couple has overcome the wolf of natural adversity.  My son and daughter-in-law prepared last year to have a baby boy. Midterm, they were informed that this baby would be born with heart problems. We prayed and fasted for this little boy. Little Matthew (Logan “Because Wolverine was not appropriate”) returned to his Heavenly Father’s presence 6 hours after he was born. During those 6 hours, I observed some of the most beautiful and loving consideration of another human being I have ever witnessed.

Though my daughter-in-law had just had major surgery and was holding her dying little boy, she reached out to my son and loved him. And though my son was mourning over the loss of dreams with his little boy, he reached to his wife and loved her. A while later, someone suggested that since they didn’t have a child that they should get divorced. They are still married, buoying each other up, as they come to terms with the loss of their mortal dreams with their son. They are steadfast on the path of eternal marriage. They are looking this wolf in the eye and choosing to honor the covenant they have made to God and each other.

There is more to marriage than getting married in the right place. One must continue working at the marriage and be aware when these wolves are trying to sneak in. One must continue to become closer to the Lord and be aware of one’s spouse’s journey as well. These two pieces to the marriage puzzle will definitely help keep the marriage whole.